Infidelity and Marriage

*Being a faithful spouse requires much more than avoiding adultery.*

How does that make you feel? What are the other things we should avoid to be COMPLETELY faithful to your one and only?

There are different types of threats to happy marriages. Some of the most common threats today include friends crossing boundaries, Facebook and another social networking sites, pornography, and couples fighting.  In order to avoid these creating rifts in our marriages we must create boundaries against outside forces.  I love the way we discussed this subject in class. Our professor compared the boundaries around our marriage needing to be like a white picket fence.  Imagine a beautiful home surrounded by this quaint boundary...

Looking at this fence what do we notice?

1. It creates a clear and distinct boundary around the home.
2. The shortness of it allows others to talk to those inside the boundaries, but still creates a barrier.
3. The pointy top dissuades anyone from sitting on the fence, they must choose a side.
4. There is an opening that allows others in, but only at that certain place.

Now how can we compare this to a marriage and the boundaries that are needed?

1. There must be clear and distinct boundaries made.  (These can be continually discussed and modified as the relationship changes, but there MUST be conversations about what each person feels comfortable with, especially before they are married.)
2. Spouses can have friends and talk to them, but there is still a distance kept.  They should only turn to their spouse to share personal things in order to build intimacy and closeness.
3. The couple must set up protectors to keep their marriage safe, by defining what actions their boundaries allow.  (Being alone with someone of the opposite gender?  What friends and family are allowed to know about problems? To what extent there are conversations on social media with others?)
4. Others can and will be allowed to be close to the marriage and those in this union.  However, it is only specified by BOTH husband and wife and allowed in at certain places.

One principle to remember, is that anytime anything takes precedence over your spouse, it could be infidelity and infidelity is the opposite of faithfulness. 

How are you strengthening your marriage each day? How are you showing your love and loyalty?

*HAPPY FAMILIES CHANGE THE WORLD*